Yesterday was the end of FOCUS New Staff Training, and this morning held the last of this year’s final goodbyes.
I’m really bad at goodbyes. Any of my college friends could tell you how terrible I am at expressing any kind of sorrow during a “so long.” It’s usually because I don’t experience much pain in the moment of a goodbye. I know I’ll miss that friend, of course I will, but it doesn’t hit me then.
Well…to be honest, it hit me this morning.
I don’t to say mean that I finally had a teary departure, because I didn’t. However, at 6 am this morning, I felt the weight of saying goodbye more than usual. Desi, my disciple from last year (and Georgie’s babysitter this summer) crawled into bed to wake me up before she left. For some reason my heart broke for all the people I love. It was like I was back in my dorm at Benedictine when my friend and disciple Marga was packing her things. Man, how hard that good bye was. Then, I remembered Allie and Hollyn, Abby, Marnee and Liz. Even those I was going to see in a few days (My family, Josh’s family, Sara, Brittany and Em) came to mind as I realized I would be leaving them shortly too.
Thankfully this sorrow was soon followed by conviction. This is what heaven will be for. In heaven we can stay. We can be all together. Now, now we have to go. We are called to go out.
“To the extent that we nourish ourselves on Christ and are in love with him, we feel within us the incentive to bring others to him: Indeed, we cannot keep the joy of the faith to ourselves; we must pass it on.”
– Pope Benedict XVI, Papal Address to Rome Diocesan Congress, June 23, 2006
To all I just left, will leave, or have left in the past: I love you dearly, and I hope to spend eternity with you. We just can’t be together now because we have to bring Jesus to others.
(Desi and Georgie)
(Me and Marnee. She was my mentor who has now left her family and friends to become a Servadora in Washington D.C.)